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Town Quirks - It's a Joke!

07/01/2008 01:00 ● Published by Anonymous

Summer-Fall 2008:

Town Quirks - It's a Joke!

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You knoyou are not a hunter when you...…WEAR BIRKENSTOCKS…POSSESS A SHOPPING CARD AT BAMBOO MARKET…ONLY OWN BRONCO ORANGE…HAVE A SKI RACK INSTEAD OF A GUN RACK…HAVE ONLY PINK CAMO…ORDER THE VEGGIE BURRITO AT AZTECA…THINK A 300 SAVAGE IS A NEW HALFPIPE TRICK…THINK SAFETY REFERS TO A “MEETING”

Not all hunting takes place in the hills. Some of it, as Aspenites can attest,occurs in the bars.With that in mind, and in case you’re ever stalked yourself,we offer the following COUGAR SEASON SURVIVAL TIPS …Avoid eye contact■ Always pay for your own drinks■ Wear loose-fitting clothes■ Practice bad hygiene■ Talk up your sacrificial wingman■ Pretend you don’t speak English■ Talk about your wife (even if you don’thave one)■ Make yourself appear smaller than you actually are■ Be aware of cougar stomping grounds (ie Mahogany Ridge, Slopeside etc.)

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